CATEGORY

According to radio psychologist and provocateur Laura Schlessinger, most unhappy marriages are alike—-and can be changed in just minutes a day. In this companion to Dr Laura's best-selling The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, women are the source of the problem and have the power of the solution. Wives, brainwashed by "feminism" and politically correct psychotherapy, have become dismissive of their husbands, denying them tenderness, pillow talk, admiration, and dinner on the table, says Schlessinger. Her prescription is deceptively simple. A wife must stop defining her power in terms of possessions, position, and independence. Instead, she should remember that "men are simpler in their emotional needs" (they are demoralized by not feeling cared for) and exercise her "awesome power to change her man and her marriage." The payoff? A husband who will "die for us"--and take out the garbage without being asked. Schlessinger coaxes readers in attitude adjustment through an assessment of their marriage and dozens of specific suggestions about compliments, conversation, counting blessings and lacy underwear. She is at her best in asking readers to explore anti-male bias in advertising and Internet jokes. Her tart commentary is interspersed with journal exercises, testimonial transcripts from her radio show, and listener letters. The book's central ideas (devotion robust listening, sensuality) are too often eclipsed by its gender typecasting of both partners and frequent frying of the feminist idea of mutuality in marriage. Both men and women will surely bristle at the book's anachronistic assumptions: for example, a silk teddy manipulates men and nothing spells loving like something from the oven. Dr. Laura's self-promotion and the defense and repetition of her earlier ideas also undermine her message. Still, it must be noted that many of her listeners and readers find Schlessinger's ten-minute marriage manager to be hopeful and helpful. --Barbara Mackoff