CATEGORY

What makes a perfect wedding? "[The bride] and the groom both look as though there were sunlight behind their eyes, as though their mouths irresistibly turned to smiles," wrote Emily Post in 1922's Etiquette. Great-granddaughter-in-law Peggy Post, author of the fourth edition of Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette, absolutely agrees with Miss Emily. To ensure those bright eyes and smiles, she imparts thoughtful and commonsensical advice on how to plan for not just your wedding, but for all the social and familial obligations and traditions that a wedding entails.

Unlike many wedding manuals, Post includes advice for the "encore" bride as well as for the new bride. In this day of remarriages and blended families, tact and strategy are often needed to make sure feelings aren't hurt and everything runs as smoothly as possible. A chapter on multicultural and interfaith marriages addresses differing world traditions and how they can be incorporated into a touching ceremony that makes both the couple and their families happy. If you are unsure of who is supposed to do what, Post gives you clear instruction, often including a flow chart that delineates the responsibilities of all people involved in the wedding party (bride's parents throw the engagement party, best man returns the tuxes, flower girl's family pays for her outfit).

Throughout Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette are sidebars with questions asked of Post regarding an amazing array of wedding-related conundrums ("My daughter's fianc wants to follow his family's tradition of having a money tree at the wedding. I personally find this distasteful; can I say so?"). This is a great book to find the answers for all those sticky questions. All involved in the wedding process should leaf through, get their bearings, smile, and then forge ahead. --Dana Van Nest